jen_bonnell (jen_bonnell) wrote,

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Okay so Im just going to say. 
I really dont know how I feel right now.
I have realized that Im a huge infulence on my little brother.  Yes its probably because he has mimiking(sorry if i didnt spell that right)  Autism But still. Everything I do he has to do it like me.  Like when we eat dinner... I dont eat a lot of meat... so he doesnt either.  I feel like Im going to basically screw him up.  
I really dont know If I can handle him totally following in my steps. It freaks me out. I wouldnt trade my brother for anything though.  and I'd probably be a very bad person if he wasnt here. Because I know that I do influence him.  Also I have come to realization that he is JUST like me.  He has my temper... He has my face.. He has my personailty.. and the little freak is almost taller than me. lol 
I love him though. He is one of the best things in my life. 
Im tired of people contradicting in my own journal what I say.  If you have anything to say... Say it in your own journal.  
This will be the last journal I post in public.  Because I do want someone to see this.
Im getting freaked out by my whole situation. and I want it to stop. 
Also... Gabe might be coming to town this weekend if he gets yard work done.  And possibly next weekend. Then I will be going to see him while Heather goes to prom on the 6th. That will be fun too. Because then we can have Jennifer and Gabe time at his house. 
Im really happy I have Gabe as a boyfriend.  I know that he will always love me for me.  No matter what happens in my life.  
So this guy that sits by me this period... Juss looked at my screen ... then complimented me on being a good influence on my brother. Artie is the coolest! (well at least in this class!)
I didnt get to talk to Gabe this morning... and It makes me feel weird. but he probably slept in longer... which isnt a problem for me. He shouldnt have to get up earlier than he did juss to talk to me before I go to school. even though I really like our conversations in the mornings...
Yeah.. this is long enough. lol
Later Skaters
Gabe's Angel

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